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LOST - Comedy Lost characters in a ROBOCOP film scene (PG 13

PostPosted: Fri May 23, 2008 1:42 pm
by The_abbott
If you have seen Robocop then you should enjoy this:

I wrote this a while back in season 2 of Lost was on. For some reason I called Ana Lucia - Amma Loser. I don't think I liked her character much

OhnoCop

Kate is eating a donut with her partner officer Charlie aka the Pace Man

Little Boy - probably called Billy: Why do they call you the pace man officer?

Charlie: well son, it's because I'm a bloody good runner

Kate: Funny I thought it was the complete opposite *Kate tilts head and stares*

Charlie: Don't do that Kate

Kate: Do what?

Charlie: that!

Radio: We have a 815 in progress

Charlie: Bloody hell a plane crash

Kate: No Charlie thats a robbery

Radio: Proceed with caution, suspects are armed and dangerous

Charlie: We should call the bloody cops!

Kate: We are the cops Charlie!

Charlie: oh right yeah I knew that - just testing.

*Kate swivels the revolver a few times before placing it into her holster*

Billy: WOW - can you do that Officer Charlie?

Charlie: If I can't do that then I'm a chocolate lollipop *Swivels gun but loses grip and the gun flies in the air to land on a table and the trigger goes off shooting Billy in the head* oh fiddles sticks

Kate: We don't have time for games Charlie lets go. I'll drive

Charlie: Thats okay I'll drive shaft us back. See what I bloody did there, A play on words. Did you see that.

Kate: Yes Charlie I saw that :roll:

*Zoom off - moments later they are following the suspects Van*

Sayid: hey Amma I beleive we have company

Amma: You talkin' to me WISE ASS?

Sayid: I do believe I was Amma, we have the police on our tail. What should I do?

Amma: Pull over

Sayid: Okay if you insist *check mirror and signals for hard shoulder*

Amma: Are you an IDIOT! - *Starts kicking Sayid* of course I don't mean to pull over. STEP ON IT!

Sayid: If you insist.

Boone: urm step on what amma. I don't see a bug around here?

*Amma's shakes head at the bunch of goons she has employed and checks the money*

Amma: You burnt the Flaming money JERK!

Locke: I had to blow the door Amma how else was I going to enter the hatch?

Amma: :roll: This money is as good as Boone.

Boone: Wha?

Amma: USELESS!

Boone: Gotcha!

*Locke rubs his face with his arm*

Locke: Maybe we could use it still, the money that is

Amma: I'm listening

Locke: We could throw the whole lot out the van and onto the police vehicle.

Amma: I got a better idea, why don't we THROW Boone out the back of the van?

Locke: Works for me!

Sayid: Thats sounds an excellent suggestion

Michael: Yeea lets throw this god damn lunatic out ma van

Boone: Wha?

*Locke opens the back doors of the van and Ama and Michael get hold of Boone*

Amma: Can you fly Booney-boy?

Boone: Oh please Amma Noooo. Not another early exit. please!

*Boone is thrown on to the oncoming police car with Kate and Charlie inside. They have to stop to remove the body from the car*

Charlie: Where the bloody hell did he come from, he almost gave me a bloody heart attack.

Kate: Well he won't be doing that again anytime soon

Charlie: Too right he won't. You matey are nicked!

Kate: Hes dead Charlie

Charlie: oh yeah right, I knew that.

Kate: I'm going to call for back up, This is officer Austin requesting back up

Radio: backup unavailable

Kate: Damn Jack where is he when I need him *starts to produce crocidile tears*

*Moments later Kate and Charlie find the van at a old warehouse*

Kate: no back up Charlie, its's just you and me

Charlie: Kate, this is no time for that sort of thing

Kate: :roll: I'll search down below

Charlie: I'll search up top, probably nothing up there

Kate: You can say that again

Charlie: Sorry Kate I missed that?

Kate: Nothing Charlie.

*charlie comes across Michael having a pee*

Charlie: Freeze and put your hands where I can see them

Michael: I can't

Charlie: do it dirtbag!

*Michael turns around with his hands up. The pee is still coming out and is going onto Charlie's shoes*

Charlie: No look what you've done. These were bloody new. Put the little one away

Michael: What dur ya know about ma boy? You stay away from ma sun!

Charlie: easy mate, I meant your little *looks down *

*Michael takes the opportunity and hits Charlie unconscous and zips up his flies*

*Meanwhile, Officer Kate has found the rest of the robbers*

Kate: drop them or I shoot!

*Locke and Sayid drop their trousers*

Kate: the guns guys, the guns!

*Locke and Sayid throw the guns down and pull their trousers back up again. Kate then bends over showing her ass to grab her radio*

Sayid: I'd buy that for a dollar!

*Locke grins*

Sayid: I would love to get my hands on something like her

*kate starts to blush*

Locke: I know what you mean Sayid - what an amazing radio

Sayid: the very best.

Kate: Shut it! - Charlie where are you - I got a situation here

*Ama enters pointing gun at Kate*

Ama: You have now!!

Re: LOST - Comedy Lost characters in a ROBOCOP film scene (PG 13

PostPosted: Sat May 24, 2008 12:01 am
by Iceman
LOL thats very funny!

Good job!

:lol:

Re: LOST - Comedy Lost characters in a ROBOCOP film scene (PG 13

PostPosted: Sun May 25, 2008 5:27 am
by Adam
Hahahahaha, excellent! I love the way you take the mickey out of Charlie :D

Re: LOST - Comedy Lost characters in a ROBOCOP film scene (PG 13

PostPosted: Sun May 25, 2008 5:32 am
by Gus TT Showbiz
:lol: Very funny, good writing.